Stop Toxically Comparing Yourself To Others- Set Yourself FREE
In today’s day and age of social media and the Internet, it’s almost impossible not to compare yourself to your extended family, friends, colleagues, competing businesses, entertainers, and everyone you view. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, Twitch, Tik Tok, and YouTube boldly enter our lives and consume us.
When you are consuming content on these platforms, it is easy for you to get a “keeping up with the Joneses” mindset, leaving your contentment for your life in the hands of others. I am sure you realize it is not best to compare yourself to the curated posts of your friends, yet we all fall hard to this mindset. We just can’t help ourselves.
When Susie is traveling to Europe with her gorgeous husband Renaldo, we are jealous. We scoff as we are viewing Pam’s home decorated by her designer Stephen. Looking at Jenny’s most enhanced abs with her trainer Diane at the gym gives us a feeling of inadequacy. Seeing the Jones family celebrating Christmas in Hawaii and taking scuba and surfing classes with their kids, allows you to feel anger. I don’t know about you, but I never liked Susie; Pam has always had everything handed to her; Jenny has never had kids; and I despise those Joneses anyway!
Let’s get real right now.
This mindset and attitude is toxic to you. It is not helping you mentally, physically or spiritually.
So, how do you stop this toxic behavior and set yourself free?
HOW TO STOP TOXICALLY COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS
Believe No One Is Perfect
Learning not to compare yourself with others must start with the acknowledgement that no one is perfect. Though it seems they are on their Instagram and Facebook platform, they are not. No matter how beautiful it is, no profile or platform appearing in your newsfeed accurately reflects the individual sacrifice, hurt and short-comings.
When you find yourself admiring what another has and feeling inadequate, STOP. This is not serving you.
FOCUS ON YOUR UNIQUENESS
Each of us have unique strengths. I know you have been told this many times and are probably giving me the eye roll. But, when you’re working on breaking the habit of comparing yourself to others, it’s imperative to evaluate your uniqueness. When you find yourself in admiration of another, stop and focus on your strengths and skills instead.
Take time to list your unique strengths.
Define Your Identity
Stop comparing yourself to others and start defining your true identity. Instead of finding guidance and conforming to other people, look inside. Build your foundation of self-esteem by understanding your values and drive. Your internal compass is your antidote to a self-fulfillment. Create an impactful and meaningful life you desire, not by the standards and expectations of others.
Write 3-5 values you hold dear.
Each of us has the desire for significance. This deep rooted need is a basic, human need. When we are not meeting this need, we look to others for meaning and purpose. If you are struggling with comparison, find a way that gives you a sense of contentment and purpose. This can be by mentoring, volunteering, or donating.
Embrace a positive way to give back.
CELEBRATE OTHERS SUCCESSES
Mastering how to stop comparing yourself to others may take time. But, as you work on developing yourself, start celebrating others achievements. Consciously enjoy others’ individual successes without being threatened by them. The simple act of celebrating others’ accomplishments, helps you eliminate the need to compare yourself to them.
Who can you celebrate today?
So if comparing yourself to other people is making you miserable, ask yourself what your motivation for comparing yourself really is.
Many of us will be surprised by the motivations lurking beneath the self-comparison waters that we’re engaged in on a daily basis.
What seems like self-assessment can subtly turn into self-enhancement when we realize we don’t quite perform the way we’d like, or have a hint of jealousy.
No matter what your motivation really is, at the end of the day, you ultimately control your thoughts, feelings, and outcomes. And this is great news.
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